A New Perception
Read Mark 14:27-31
“You will all fall away,” Jesus told them, “for it is written: ‘I will strike the shepherd, and the sheep will be scattered.’” –Mark 14:27
A supervisor once shared with me a story about some sage advice that she received from her therapist. My supervisor shared that she consistently was late for her meetings with this therapist—she was always juggling a lot of balls at work, and the therapy was not a high priority for her. Hence, she was always walking in five minutes late. Every time, she would apologize profusely to the therapist: “I’m so sorry! I promise, I’m usually a very punctual person. I’ll do better next time!” But then it would happen again at the next appointment.
After the third or fourth time this happened, the therapist held up her hand during my supervisor’s apology and looked at her over the top of her glasses. “You keep telling me that you are a ‘very punctual person,’” the therapist began. “Well, you either need to get a new watch or you need a new self-perception.”
The way my supervisor saw herself was not the way that others were experiencing her. She had taken on so many commitments that her “core commitment” to punctuality and reliability had fallen by the wayside. She needed someone to hold up a mirror so she could see the truth of her life. (And I am sure my supervisor shared this story with me because I needed “a new self-perception” in some area of my working life!)
I thought of this story while considering Jesus’ prediction of the disciples’ desertion. Jesus warned them that, when he was arrested, they would all scatter. None of the disciples believed that to be true. The disciples saw themselves in much more heroic light than their reality. They didn’t realize how much of their strength and confidence came from Jesus.
Peter, in particular, was adamant. Even if everyone else fell away, he proclaimed, he would remain at Jesus’ side. You need a new self-perception, Jesus told him. “Before the cock crows twice, you will deny me three times.” Peter did not believe it; he was sure that would never happen until it did.
It can be painful when someone reveals something about ourselves that we’d rather not see. But it is important to have an accurate view of ourselves—our strengths, our shortcomings, and especially our limits. And it is equally important to remember with this the grace of Jesus—to know that his love is constant, even when ours fails.
Jesus knew the disciples’ courage would fail, and they would scatter like sheep. However, he also assured them that, following his resurrection, he would “go before them to Galilee.” Jesus told his disciples where they could find him, so that they could remember that he was always ready to receive them with open arms.
Where in your life might you need a new “self-perception”? Who do you trust to share that truth with you? And who can remind you, in the same breath, that you are loved exactly as you are?
Help me to see myself truly, O Lord. For in my weakness, Your strength is made perfect. And in my failures, I learn to trust in Your grace alone. Thank you for those whom You have placed in my life to speak both truth and love. May I be such a kind and gentle voice to others. Amen.