Where Do You Belong?

Read Mark 3:31-35

Then Jesus looked at those seated in a circle around him and said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.” –Mark 3:34-35

At the same time as Jesus was dealing with false rumors from the Pharisees, he was also dealing with conflict within his own family. The religious leaders accused him of being possessed by an evil spirit. I’m sure that hurt. But his family reportedly said, “He’s out of his mind!” (Mark 3:21). I bet that hurt even more.

There are a couple of word plays in the Greek text that are helpful here. The first is the word existémi, which the translators render “out of his mind.” This word is used seventeen times in the New Testament, and in fifteen of those occurrences, it is used positively as a description of “amazement.” When Jesus performed miracles—healing people or casting out demons—the general response of the crowds was existémi. They were “beside themselves” with wonder and awe. But when Jesus’ family heard about the wonders that he was doing, they were not amazed. Instead, they said Jesus was existémi. But they did not mean it in a positive way—they meant he was deranged or crazy.

The second word-play involves a longer phrase—hoi par’ autou—which the translators render as “his family.” But that’s not exactly how the Greek reads. The literal translation of that phrase would be “those belonging to him.” So those who once “belonged to Jesus” decided he was “out of his mind,” and they left their home in Nazareth to “seize” him and bring him back home.

So that’s the context behind the scene that Mark relates at the end of this chapter: “Then Jesus’ mother and brothers arrived. Standing outside, they sent someone in to call him. A crowd was sitting around him, and they told him, ‘Your mother and brothers are outside looking for you.’” (3:31-32) Jesus did not joyfully get up and go greet them. Instead, he responded: Who are my mother and my brothers? Not those who are standing outside. No, my real family is right here with me—those who do my Father’s will.

On the surface of it, Jesus’ words feel kind of harsh, as if he were rejecting his family. But in truth, he was responding to their rejection of him (in some ways, this was a continuation of the rejection he received in Nazareth). They were not coming in love to support His work. They were coming to restrain him.

So let me take you back to the phrase that was originally translated as “family” in verse 21: “those belonging to him.” To me, the keyword in that phrase is “belonging.” All of us seek out a place where we can belong; it is one of the most fundamental needs of the human heart to be in a place where we are accepted and loved. But “belonging” can have a double meaning; it can also refer to possessions. True belonging (unconditional acceptance and love) gives freedom. False belonging (conditional acceptance and love) restrains and limits who we are meant to be.

Jesus did not belong to his family; he was not their possession to seize or restrain or define. So Jesus redefined his family to include those who shared his ministry. They belonged to one another, but not in a restrictive kind of way. Rather, their “belonging” gave them a place of support and encouragement, and set them free to live out God’s will.

So perhaps you can spend some time today reflecting on your own experience of “belonging.” In what ways has your family empowered you to become who you are today? What other people (beyond your immediate family) have helped you find a place of belonging and acceptance? How can you support those who “belong to you” without limiting who they are called to be?

Thank you, God, for the communities where I have found true belonging. Help me to extend to others the same unconditional support and acceptance that I long for myself. Help me to live as Your true brother or sister. Amen.